So after writing almost an entire paragraph on why I like Korean music and tv, I decided it would be better if I just said I liked it and stop right there. Nobody enjoys my fantasies of my Korean shows, so I won't write them down here and bore whoever might be reading this.
This week has been successfully productive. I know I said in my last post that I'm proud of myself, but I really am. I am thankful for the determination and will that God has given me. I'm still in the transition period of being at school because I want to learn, not to earn good grades, but I think I'll reach my final destination soon. At this point in time I'm reminded of why I have so much time for school: because I'm single. This semester Encounter is focusing on passion, pursuit, and purity. The past few weeks we've been discussing what being single means, and why it's not a bad thing. It's been helpful for me, who's been struggling with a break-up. At first I was angry, sad, and hurt, but now I am content with just being me. And by me I mean God and I. I no longer have to worry about anybody else but myself, in a sense. Of course, I'll always have friends who I care about and want to be with, but the relationship with them and the relationship with God are completely different. So I've never been worried about God not being there for me. My real problem is giving up control. So far in my life, I don't think I've ever successfully surrendered control. I'm a control freak and am full of pride, so someone telling me to give all of my troubles to Him and not worry about anything sounds crazy. Most of the time, I don't think I consciously keep God out of my bubble. Giving up control is something I hope I will be able to achieve by the end of this semester. I know it's not an easy thing to do, but I know that if I stay committed to this, it'll happen.
And I fully plan on being committed. That's another thing I'm working on this semester. I didn't realize until now the importance of setting a goal for yourself, and I'm taking full advantage of it now. I found that setting goals for myself give me the determination and focus I need to carry out those goals. It's almost like a light bulb went off in my brain saying, "Well duh, why didn't I think of that sooner?" This new found light (or God) has given me feelings of admiration, happiness, and a strength that I didn't know existed. I feel like I've just started in a relationship. Not a physical one, but a spiritual one, with the Big Man Upstairs. Now that I think about it, I guess I'm not single after all, and never will be again if I can help it. Who would want to give up this feeling of awe, love, joy, and fulfillment? Not me!
This week has been successfully productive. I know I said in my last post that I'm proud of myself, but I really am. I am thankful for the determination and will that God has given me. I'm still in the transition period of being at school because I want to learn, not to earn good grades, but I think I'll reach my final destination soon. At this point in time I'm reminded of why I have so much time for school: because I'm single. This semester Encounter is focusing on passion, pursuit, and purity. The past few weeks we've been discussing what being single means, and why it's not a bad thing. It's been helpful for me, who's been struggling with a break-up. At first I was angry, sad, and hurt, but now I am content with just being me. And by me I mean God and I. I no longer have to worry about anybody else but myself, in a sense. Of course, I'll always have friends who I care about and want to be with, but the relationship with them and the relationship with God are completely different. So I've never been worried about God not being there for me. My real problem is giving up control. So far in my life, I don't think I've ever successfully surrendered control. I'm a control freak and am full of pride, so someone telling me to give all of my troubles to Him and not worry about anything sounds crazy. Most of the time, I don't think I consciously keep God out of my bubble. Giving up control is something I hope I will be able to achieve by the end of this semester. I know it's not an easy thing to do, but I know that if I stay committed to this, it'll happen.
And I fully plan on being committed. That's another thing I'm working on this semester. I didn't realize until now the importance of setting a goal for yourself, and I'm taking full advantage of it now. I found that setting goals for myself give me the determination and focus I need to carry out those goals. It's almost like a light bulb went off in my brain saying, "Well duh, why didn't I think of that sooner?" This new found light (or God) has given me feelings of admiration, happiness, and a strength that I didn't know existed. I feel like I've just started in a relationship. Not a physical one, but a spiritual one, with the Big Man Upstairs. Now that I think about it, I guess I'm not single after all, and never will be again if I can help it. Who would want to give up this feeling of awe, love, joy, and fulfillment? Not me!
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